1. What made the best sex partner you’ve ever had so good?
Silverdrop (SD): His massive, awe-inspiring, gigantic cock.
SilverHubby (SH): I don’t wish to sound like Casanova, but I’ve had one male lover and perhaps 15 female lovers including Silverdrop. Although some of the sex has been indifferent, a lot of it was good, and some of it was spectacular. But I can honestly say with Silverdrop, despite our mutual disabilities, our sex is rarely less than spectacular. I think this is because her body always makes me feel welcome, plus I can feel beyond doubt that I have her full and undivided attention. So it’s not necessarily that she is the best sexual partner I’ve ever had in terms of technique (although she is), it’s more than she’s the most emotionally involved sexual partner I’ve ever been with, and it’s that more than the physical stuff that makes her sex spectacular.
SD: Um, yeah. All that stuff too. Yup.
SH: Yes, dear. I’m sorry if you’re going to accuse me of making your answers look boring again. Should I have talked about your massive, awe-inspiring, gigantic G-spot, and the fact that I only have to be in the same room as it for you to be multi-orgasmic?
2. What made the worst sex partner you’ve ever had so bad?
(SD): I was a notch on the bedpost to him and once we’d slept together he was no longer interested in me.
(SH): The fact that she was almost totally unresponsive and, perhaps even worse, totally uncommunicative. This meant I rarely knew what she liked or wanted, nor whether she was enjoying what I was doing.
3. Who was the most physically attractive person you ever had sex with?
(SD): My ex-husband occasionally looked good enough for Holywood. But SilverHubby can devour me with his eyes and make me melt with his dimples, so I think he gets the prize.
(SH): I am attracted way more to personality and intelligence than I am to looks. That being said, Silverdrop is easily the most attractive person I have ever slept with – she manages to be a bitch and a beautiful person at the same time. Trust me, this is possible.
BTW, I do not have dimples.
(SD): Yes dear..
4. How was it?
(SD): With the ex or with SilverHubby? With the ex, towards the end it was worse than no sex at all. He made me feel like having sex with me was a chore he had to do. With SilverHubby that is not even a little bit of an issue. I feel loved and desired and cherished in a way I never thought possible before him.
(SH): Fucking amazing. We regularly ask ourselves how our sex just keeps getting better and better.
BTW, I still do not have dimples.
(SD): I can see them right now.
(SH): Yes dear.
5. Who was the least physically attractive person you ever had sex with?
(SD): Myself. There were times with my ex-husband towards the end, where I felt I must be ugly, undesirable and unfuckable. When I look back, my body was in the best physical shape I have ever been in my life before or since. It’s amazing what scorn in the eyes of a lover can do to destroy a person.
(SH): None of them. If I want to have sex with a person I find them attractive in some way which may have nothing to do with their physical appearance. Frankly, I find the question mildly offensive.
BTW, if I did have dimples, they would be hidden by the frown on my face caused by the question.
6. Why did you do it?
(SD): What choice did I have – I needed some sort of outlet that I wasn’t getting from him.
(SH): I am not going to dignify that with an answer.
7. How was it?
(SD): Pretty wretched, but better than nothing – at least I had myself.
(SH): This space intentionally left blank.
Bonus: Describe a bad sexual experience you admit was your fault.
(SD): This is a depressing group of questions towards the end and I’m now feeling too morose to try and conjure up one of my worst sexual experiences and will leave it to your imagination.
(SH): My non-existent dimples are still banished by the frown.