And this is what he said …
Hmm, discussion eh? This takes me back to degree study days … “Thinking of Homer’s Oddyssey and the Iliad, one has been described as a poem about war, and the other about peace. To what extent do you think this is true? Discuss.”
Did the above just blow what little remains of my street cred? I’ve just revealed myself as a classical scholar. *grins*
Anyway, to get back to the subject … It also makes me think of some pretty fundamental things about our BDSM relationship, that are probably at least somewhat applicable to other people’s too.
- We discuss, I decide. That is to say that I take great pains to ensure that you have a voice that is listened to. So, although you have submitted to me, you tell me you have never felt so understood, cherished, loved etc.
- First among equals. Some years ago, to my surprise at the time, you told me that I had feminist tendencies because of the way I see women as equals. You are also my equal in my mind and yours and I seek your opinion in most things before deciding – often with ‘lively’ discussion. This can range from the semi-lighthearted “Which flogger would you like me to use tonight, dear?” to our recent discussion as to which new car to buy. But you have chosen to submit to me and that, paradoxically, makes me first among equals in our relationship.
- I actually find it very difficult to say “No.” to you. That seems to be getting harder as your health deteriorates. This tendency has sparked some interesting discussions.
- Your opinion matters deeply to me – you are my sub, not my doormat. That’s why I value our discussions – even the ones that turn into disagreements. *grins*
Previous posts from So I asked SilverHubby here.